for Hooch the bacon king

Get ready to GROAN.

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to
death. They are close to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable,
when all of a sudden…

"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon I is sure of eet.’
‘Si, Luis,eet smells like bacon to me.’
So, with renewed strength, they struggle up the next sand dune, and
there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There’s raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there’s fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon… every imaginable kind of cured pig meat.
'Pepe, Pepe, we is saved. ‘Ees a bacon tree.’
‘Luis, are you sure ees not a meerage? We ees in the desert don’t
‘Pepe when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon…ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree’.
And with that… Luis races towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe following closely behind, when all of a sudden, a
machine gun opens up,and Luis is cut down in his tracks. It is clear he is mortally wounded but, a true friend that he is, he manages to warn Pepe with his dying breath.
‘Pepe… go back man,you was right ees not a bacon tree.’
'Luis Luis mi amigo… what ees it?
'Pepe… ees not a bacon tree…

Ees a Ham Bush!!
:lol :lol :hombre :hombre :drunk :rollin :horsey :green

We luvs it :thumbsup :lol

Yes, wees do luvs it! Thanks for the laugh, Cindy Lou! :thumbsup

Auntie Hope :pickin :green

This is a very sad and touching story of two brave men and their quest for bacon. I think we can all relate to their very human struggle again the odds and mother nature herself to reach their heart’s desire…Bacon.

Bacon, in it’s purest form, really is a metaphor for the human spirit. It is love. It is hope. It is delicious. And it goes excellent with eggs.

Everyone please stand as we say the Pledge of Allegiance to Bacon:

Bacon, Bacon, how we adore thee.
We praise your name with mirthful glee.
Your greasy crispness is revered through the ages
By kings and peasants and mystical mages.
You fill our hearts with love and lard
And make our tongues dance and our arteries hard.
Your varieties have become a world-renowned staple
From peppered to pre-cooked, thick-sliced, and maple.
If you were a girl I would marry you this instant
Even if you were pregnant and your father was insistent.
So all hail to Bacon…the proof there is a God at work
Wanting us to be happy with slices of pork.


Cindy Lou, please pass around the offering plate.

Would that be a plate of BACON? :budumdum :popcorn

A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy?"

-Albert Einstein

Tom, too many bacon martinis? I’d help you up, but my arms aren’t long enough. :lol :lol :lol

Judas Priest, people! I can’t get any work done around here with all this talk of bacon!!!

:lol :lol :medal :lol :lol You guys are in top form today
:clap :clap :rollin :rollin :clap :clap

                          Cindy you are so funny!!

Sheesh, just sizzle back in your office chair and slice back into your work. Pound, pound, pound away. :bash

Or Mayo I suggest that you Beg-un your boss “Lettuce leave early today, and I promise to get this work Toast-ed Tomato!!!” :quote


Matt, if I get fired for drooling on my keyboard it is all on YOUR shoulders man!!!

Wait!!! Money-making idea!!! Hooch flavored bacon!!! Looks like I’m doing some cooking tonight!!!

Yum, bacon cured in hooch! Good idea there lampshade.

Since Hooch is an engineer - he needs a flow chart to explain that bacon:

I just printed this out on the color laser at work and will post it on my door…

I am choking to death from laughing so hard…and I CAN’T wait to get home and make BLT for dinner! :lol :lol :lol :lol

I wish I wasn’t allergic to Bacon :rolleyes

My GOD!! It all makes so much sense!!!

That is so sad…moment of silence for all you can’t eat bacon.

When I used to work on the river I had two vegetarians on two different trips fall off the vegetarian wagon succumbing to…

BACON! :eek

Seems they could not resist the smell of several pounds of bacon boiling, sizzling in a huge dutch oven slowly getting crispy in its own fat.

Bacon is not only the Food of Life, it also makes for great river entertainment - ala the Grease Bomb :thumbsup

That is freakin hilarious Hippie!!!

I have to go get some bacon now…putting my pants back on

Most people know that I have strange eating habits…I eat no meat, fish, chicken etc…etc…BUT I do LOVE my bacon!!! Crispy please!!! Thank You! It goes great with pancakes, french toast and waffles…aaahhhhh dip it in the syrup…oh oh how good it is!
say…could I get a couple of slices of that bacon from you???

Connie I miss you guys! :frowning:
I will eat my bacon in your honor…and I TOTALLY agree bacon slathered in maple syrup is too die for…

Hugs! :hop