First, drive north from Santa Fe to Pagosa Springs, then west to Mancos, north to Dolores and up to T-ride. It’s mostly 2-lane roads, but the passes near Durango and east of Mancos are either 4 lane or 3-lane (two regular lanes and a passing lane).
The other route is to head south to Albuquerque, then up 550. There are a couple of options once you get to Bloomfield. Either head north to Durango then over to Mancos, or west to Farmington and up along NM 140 to Hesperas, then onto Mancos etc.
I drive the last version a LOT, even in the winter, and tho it’s beautiful, I never think of it as dangerous. From Mancos, it’s 2 lane roads, but the speed limits aren’t high. And from Dolores to T-ride it’s a nice ride along the river. The only somewhat scary part is once you get past Lizard Head pass, but the speed limit drops a LOT as you head towards T-ride.
OK, just one more thought. Get to Durango then jump on the daily bus that goes into Telluride. Ive never taken it, but once you’re in T-ride you won’t really need a car anyway.
And finally, we have a lot of people coming up from Albuq, with schedules staggered throughout the week. If you decide to head this way, you can certainly follow one of us up there. And I will keep my ears open to see if anyone has extra room to eliminate your drive completely!